How to Get Away With....

It’s happening all over

Just like you remember when
The vast right wing conspiracy
Is on the move again

They’ve got their pitchforks sharpened

And their banners all unfurled
To see if they can stop
The smartest woman in the world

Their motives may be many

But their tactics are revealing
They just don’t want a woman
Crashing through that Crystal Ceiling

The campaign clouds have gathered
And when it pours, it’s rainin’
So now it seems for certain
She’ll have to do some ‘splainin’

I’ve done my best to save her from
Conservative abuses
By working out and offering
Some plausible excuses

She could just come out swinging

But not with crude or crass words
“I would have used department mail
But couldn’t recall my passwords”
 
She could play contrite and thoughtful
If she wants another take
“Yes, I’m sorry that this happened,
But what difference does it make.”

At last I think I’ve figured out

Her most effective play
If I were Mrs. Clinton
Then here’s what I would say.

"The subjects were so sensitive

I couldn’t take a chance
I had a secret server built
In Sandy Berger’s pants.”

So there’s a few excuses
And there could be many more
Or I guess that she could use
A few that she has used before.