The More You Know

I’ve always been so grateful
To the folks at NBC
They’ve done the best they can
To make a better man of me

They told me to eat vegetables

And how to raise my kids
With strategies to help avoid
The plague and AIDS and SIDS

They told me not to bully

And what exercise to try
To think before I texted
And what pick-up truck to buy

They said, about opinions

None are better, none are worse
Provided that my own
Were all sufficiently diverse

I listened to them faithfully

And did what they were urgin’
Including, by example,
How to pick a plastic surgeon

You just can’t watch those promos

Without notice or acknowledgin’
That what these folks are expert in
Are Botox, tucks, and collagen
 
The Emmys and the Peabody
They put up on their shelves
Proves that they’re correct—
In how they feel about themselves

Those know-it-alls at NBC
They’re really awful nice
And so I think it’s my turn now
To offer good advice

Here’s a little lesson

I think all of them should try
The truth, in every circumstance,
Is better than a lie

Please add that to the archive

‘Cause it’s clear, the more you know
The healthier your life will be...
Your friend, Tarzana Joe