State of the U nion

Because it’s wise to scrutinize
The nation’s apparatus
Once a year the president
Reports the union’s status

He stands before the congress
Which is a fitting forum
And they receive his message
With appropriate decorum

They clap for all his programs
And laugh at all his jokes
And cheer the founding fathers
He randomly invokes

Though at the peroration
Just half the quorum stands
For, alas, the other half
Is sitting on its hands

But every leader honors
This peculiar institution
It is, of course, required
By that pesky Constitution

These speeches run together
And tangle in my head
I swear I heard Obama say
What Jimmy Carter said.

He thinks we don’t remember
It sets my blood to boil
Every time he mentions
Merit pay and foreign oil

And then those tax incentives
I’m sure you heard him pitch
But don’t take those deductions
If you happen to be rich

I want to watch the broadcast
With rectitude and pride
And hate it when I scare the cat
By shouting out, “You lied!”

Perhaps the next commander
Will see that it’s exped-ier
To skip the whole oration thing
And work with social media