Song of the Calm Candidates

Song of the Calm Conservative

In politics, I’ve always thought
My outlook to be sanguine
I’m never one to hit the streets
With pots and pans a’bang-uine

If I converse with Democrats
I disagree with--slightly
I gently say what’s on my mind
And listen quite politely

In matters of direction
The country has a choice
And though I’d like to sway you
I’ll never raise my voice

But I’ve observed in recent weeks
The left’s progressive rancor
They’ve treated me as shabbily
As an investment banker

Of Democratic tactics
I’ll gladly share my take,
Never stop your enemy
When he’s making a mistake

I find their zeal inspiring
If I may speak the truth
And I’ll adjust my attitude
Inside the voting booth

The moment is upon us
To paraphrase a quote
Now is the time for all good men
To donate, rally, vote

We’ll meet them on the beaches
We’ll fight them in the trenches
From Maine to Colorado
It’s time to clear the benches

I see a brighter future
When men and women rally
To genuine conservatives
Like Broden and Todd Lally

Cooly urge your neighbor
To action just in case he
Hasn't learned of candidates
Like Rooney or Renacci

I have no apprehensions
And feel we cannot fail
If we support quite calmly
Mike Castle and Ben Quayle

Each one can do his portion
The highest to the least man
And make a contribution
To candidates like Eastman

To those still on the sidelines
Watch as the country learns
To toast Speaker Pelosi
By voting for Tim Burns

So when the campaign’s over
And this election’s through
I’ll have serenely done my part
Djou?