Answering the Call

 

Just about the time Joe Flacco’s touchdown pass was thrown

My focus was distracted by the ringing of the phone

I said, “Please hold the wire,” but the voice would brook no stalling

“Hello,” he said, “The National Republicans are calling.”

I turned back to the game because I didn’t want to miss it.

What genius at the RNC chose this time to solicit?

I told him that his timing could have used a little tweaking

It didn’t seem to matter ‘cause the guy went right on speaking

I didn’t want to holler and I didn’t mean to scold him

This “expletive deleted” is precisely what I told him

I live in California where the call of fortune’s taken me

So tell me why my party has entirely forsaken me?

Abandoning the Golden State—there’s nothing that’s insaner…

I told him that I’d like to have a word with Mr. Boehner

I told him if they needed help I’d send them both a map

He said he’d wake the Speaker who was busy with his nap

A Speaker should be speaking which I wanted to remind him…

The guy picked up the line and sadly said he couldn’t find him.

The Leadership I want leads from the front—like Dolly Parton

They shouldn’t be missing persons on the side of some milk carton

I want to stay Republican…but if I had my druthers
I’d like to have the Party managed by the Harbaugh brothers.